The President of the United States recently gave his yearly State of the Union address. Historically these speeches can either inspire or depress you depending on your political persuasion. It made me think of something more personal and close to home.
If you were to give a speech on the state of your marital union what would it sound like? Would there be more positive than negative news? Would you be tempted to throw in a few well-intentioned promises or hollow platitudes? I wonder if your listener; aka your spouse, would feel encouraged or pessimistic afterwards.
Allow me to give you a very hypothetical, (in other words completely made up example): If I were to ask my husband what he thought of my cooking (he might say, “what cooking?”), but let’s just say if I were to cook dinner-and then ask him what he thought of my cooking, I would want him to be more of a politician, and tell me what I wanted to hear, or at least soften the truth for me. However when it comes to the really important topics in our relationship, such as his overall contentment with me, I really don’t want him to candy coat the truth.
Every so often my husband and I will ask each other a simple question:
How are we (as a couple) doing? What can I do better as a husband, or as a wife? We use this as an opportunity to listen without getting defensive, to gain insight into the other person, and to grow even closer as husband and wife. Think of it as an exploratory committee of two!
Like politics, many of us can go through our daily lives not paying too close attention, only to find that somewhere along the road, we may have missed an opportunity to make a difference for those that we love. Don’t do that. Get actively involved in your marriage, put God front and center and make the state of your union strong!
A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back to back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.
Ecclesiastes 4:12 NLT
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This is great, Kelly! And such an important reminder. I think so many times we let too much time pass with all the day to day "stuff", that we forget to be sure we're OK so to speak.
ReplyDeleteKeep up the great blogging.
Thanks for the inspiration and God's word.
Love it! Only being a baby in the marriage department I still feel that you can make good habits of bad ones. I know that as a married couple Peter and I force each other to talk about things that we know the other person is keeping bottled up. It helps keep us honest and makes the communication stronger! You guys are an amazing example!
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